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Starting early is key when it comes to sex education.
Although you don't have to tell your toddler all about the birds and the bees, you can teach him about the various parts of his body.
When your child is between eight and 12 years old, you can talk to him about reproductive systems and, eventually, what happens when a couple have sex.
Dr Brian Yeo, consultant psychiatrist at Mount Elizabeth Medical Centre, said you can talk to your children about sex in late primary school but you can start earlier in terms of 'creating a support system for your child'.
There is no time frame for talking to your child about sex, but sexual health experts Mind Your Body spoke to advise doing it in stages.
Ms Vanessa van Auer, clinic director of EVA Psychology Centre, said: 'First, talk about the body and changes that take place. Then, talk about the reproductive organs and finally discuss intimate relationships, things to be aware of and consequences associated with sex.'
Ms Chong Cheh Hoon, senior vice-president at Focus On The Family, added: 'Sex education is never a cookie-cutter model. You have to adjust to the nuances of each child's temperament and subscribe to each family's moral compass as well as be sensitive to social trends.'
The most important thing is to create an open, trusting environment and for parents to decide on what values or messages they want to impart to their child.
While talking about sex may seem daunting and the last thing parents may want to do during a relaxing weekend, they can - and should - use instances in everyday life to jumpstart a discussion.
For example, when you see a pregnant woman on the street, you can start a conversation with your child about how babies are made.
Dr Yeo said: 'If your child is not ready to discuss things, leave it.'
Parents should listen to and answer their children's questions on sex as honestly as they can and allow them to air their views on sex and sexuality.
It may also be a good idea for the child to confide in a trusted adult, like a relative or person from the family's church, if he feels uncomfortable sharing with his parents.
Ms Kelly Lee, programme officer and counsellor at The Singapore Planned Parenthood Association, said youths are beginning to get curious about sex as early as 12 or 13 years old.
She said: 'They should know that there are responsibilities and consequences that come with sex.'
| Hazards of unprotected sex |
| Chlamydia
Transmission: Through unprotected sex and can spread from genitals to the eyes via fingers.
Symptoms: Most people have no symptoms or it may not show for years. There may be abnormal discharge from the penis or vagina, pain in the testicles and a burning sensation when urinating. Long-term irritation may cause lower abdominal pain, inflammation of the eyes and skin lesions. In women, there may be pain during sex and when urinating, bleeding after sex or between periods.
Treatment: Antibiotics. If left untreated in women, it can result in pelvic inflammatory disease which can lead to chronic pain and infertility.
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| Genital herpes
Transmission: By Herpes Simplex Virus Type 2 through close skin contact such as unprotected and oral sex.
Symptoms: There may be small red bumps, blisters or open sores on the penis, vagina or surrounding areas which appear three to 10 days after contact.
The patient may experience pain when urinating, fever, headache and muscle aches. There may be an itching or burning sensation around the genitals. In women, there may be vaginal discharge.
Treatment: Antiviral medication can be given to treat the infection but the condition can recur.
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| Genital warts
Transmission: By the Human Papillomavirus (HPV) through close skin contact, usually during unprotected sex.
Symptoms: Genital warts first appear as small, hard painless bumps on the penis, in the vaginal area or around the anus. Sometimes there are no symptoms. If left untreated, they can develop a fleshy, cauliflower-like appearance. They also increase the risk of genital cancers like cervical cancer.
Treatment: No cure. Females between nine and 26 years old who have not been exposed to HPV can take a HPV vaccine to prevent getting genital warts.
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| Gonorrhoea
Transmission: Sexually transmitted bacterial infection. Symptoms: There may be pain or a burning sensation when urinating, as well as yellowish and sometimes bloody discharge from the penis or vagina. Symptoms usually appear three to five days after contact. However, many men have no symptoms.
Treatment: Antibiotics. If left untreated, it can lead to pelvic inflammatory disease in women or infertility in both sexes.
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| Human immunodeficiency virus (HIV / Aids)
Transmission: Through sex or close contact with infected blood like transfusions.
Symptoms: Many have no symptoms for 10 years or more. Patients may experience prolonged fever, fatigue and night sweats, swollen glands, diarrhoea and mouth ulcers between one and six weeks after infection and each episode can last a few days to a few weeks.
Treatment: No cure. Treatment includes taking medicines to stop the virus from replicating.
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This article was first published in Mind Your Body, The Straits Times on Sep 18, 2008.
For more The Straits Times stories, click here.
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