In the birthing game, however, there are more and more schools of thought emerging that promise the ultimate gain without the ouch factor - a pain-free baby delivery.

I've always been a rather clucky person with plans for at least two children when I eventually start my own family. The trauma of the birthing process, however, is obviously my biggest concern.

The joys of raw epidural-free labour? How Neanderthal is that?

Like many women in this self-medicating over-the-counter generation, I'm averse to pain in a big way. When it comes to talking pop, I want to hear my future gynecologist stress two words: pain-free - failing which, I might just attempt to sneak my entire shelf of painkillers and muscle relaxants into the delivery room.

Maybe I won't be such a trigger-happy pill-popper when mommy-to-be instincts eventually kick in. Still, in this day and age, there is a plethora of birthing methods out there promising pain-free deliveries. The problem is you can't exactly employ them all at one go, can you?

Hypnobirthing

One pain-free method gaining an almost cult-like following these days is HypnoBirthing.

It all began when Marie Mongan, an award-winning hypnotherapist mother-of-four, basically psyched herself to feel no pain while delivering her third child - completely anesthesia-free. She first published her "HypnoBirthing?: A Celebration Of Life" in 1989 and HypnoBirthing is now practiced in countries all over the world - including Singapore.

Based on the premise that fear is what causes contractions during childbirth, Mongan claims hypnosis can free one from neuromuscular tension and negate all adrenalin-induced discomfort.

The thing is: you have to be open to hypnosis in the first place to be able to benefit from HypnoBirthing. Having attempted to be placed under hypnosis in a previous experiment, with less-than-ideal results, I'm guessing I might not be a suitable candidate for any method that involves mental discipline.

Natural Caesarean Section

Natural births have been traditionally touted as the most fulfilling method of delivery with Caesarean sections reserved for emergency situations. Personally, I am inclined to choose the C-section as a default birthing method - scars would probably not bug me as much as committing to a strict post-partum regimen of kegels.

Imagine then a "natural Caesarean" procedure. Under a modified epidural, the mother is able to sit up and watch as the obstetrician makes a few quick incisions through the abdominal wall and into the uterus. He them lifts the baby halfway out of the womb and lets the baby acclimatize to its new surroundings while still attached to the umbilical cord and breathing oxygen from the placenta. The surgeon then massages the baby to simulate a natural vaginal birth, producing a gentle, non-traumatic delivery for both mother and infant.

Pioneered by Professor Nicholas Fisk in London, the slower pace of the procedure is said to reduce drastically the trauma experienced by the baby and lower phenomenon such as post-partum depression for the mother.

Apart from having to overcome the natural squeamishness any mother would feel watching her baby bump get sliced open, I must say this method sounds quite fascinating. I've always thought being hatched out of an egg at your own pace sounded like a genteel way to greet the world. This comes pretty close.

Waterbirth

If I ever choose to give birth naturally, without any help from old Caesar, it would have to be a water delivery. Apart from my personal history growing up as a water baby, the thought of being in a pool of clean, cool water would calm me down immediately in any stressful situation.

The idea is that deep-water immersion creates natural gravity-defying buoyancy that allows for the mother's body to move spontaneously to the birthing rhythm. Further, the father is encouraged to cradle the mother from behind to enhance the soothing relaxation that will lessen the body's secretion of stress-related hormones. The trauma of being expelled into the world is also considerably lessened as the baby's new watery environ is not too far removed from the familiar amniotic sac.

All this, plus no perspiration, makes water birth my undoubted choice of delivery.

Lotus Birthing

Lotus birth is the practice of leaving the umbilical cord uncut, so that the baby remains attached to its placenta and releases it in its own time - usually three to 10 days after birth.

Practitioners claim numerous physiological, emotional, and spiritual benefits: an enormous amount of oxygen-rich blood from the cord and placenta which prevents anemia and weight-loss; increased bonding between mother and child during the Lotus stage; and the strengthening of the baby's immune system.

It's almost like giving birth to a baby with his own IV-drip for a week or so. The placenta bag that has to be carried around with him everywhere does not make for the most glamorous photo opportunities, but I guess it can be covered up and lightly sprinkled with baby powder to keep any unwanted smells at bay.

Acupuncture / Acupressure

For those who swear by Traditional Chinese Medicine, acupuncture could well be a suitable choice - to relieve pain, induce labour and turn breech babies.

Concentrating on getting the body's energy moving to help women get "unstuck" from specific spots in the labour process, acupuncture uses thin needles at specific points to encourage the delivery along. And for mothers who are not too comfortable with the thought of being poked by needles in an already violent situation, acupressure is apparently just as effective.

Now, all I need is to convince a man to hug me in the birthing pool, administer acupressure with a hypnotic voice and carry the placenta around for the following week. Or hold my hand while we both watch me get sliced open. Decisions, decisions.

This article was first published in the TheLivingRoom.sg, Jan 2008.